I have the impression I reach for my phone in a lot of different situations and I’d like to reduce that. A common situation is when I need to wait for anything, I’ve noticed it’s almost an automatic trigger that I grab my phone. It’s as if I can’t have a single moment of boredom and I already need to be entertained or do something “productive” (mainly answering messages that aren’t really that urgent or important).

I started thinking about the situations where this happens:

• Phone-based triggers: vibration, notifications
• Waiting for the elevator
• Waiting inside the elevator
• Waiting in line
• In the gym between sets
• Sitting on the toilet
• Eating alone

There’s a few situations I’m glad I never or very rarely use my phone, but where I do often see people doing it:

• Stuck in traffic (granted I don’t drive that often, but I still never do it)
• Walking alone (the only exception for me is if I’m looking for directions)
• Peeing on the toilet (although I admit, I’ve done it in the past; interestingly, if you catch someone doing this they immediately put the phone away, so I guess everyone knows it’s disgusting to do this)
• Eating with people. Of course there are exceptions to this rule, sometimes you really need to answer an important message. But otherwise I find it mostly disrespectful. It’s ok to peek on your phone, it’s not ok to browse Instagram or answer multiple messages.

Reducing usage

Mainly I want to reduce phone usage because I feel like it’s a lack of self-control to reach for something so often. Often even without thinking about it. Can’t I really be alone with my thoughts for a few minutes?

There are a few things that can be done to reduce this.

Reducing notifications

You can work on reducing the number of notifications you receive.

1. Reduce which apps can notify you of anything. Many apps are happy to spam you with notifications, but besides messaging apps, I rarely want to be notified of anything. I want notifications about credit card usage (to detect fraud quickly). I definitely don’t want notifications about new videos on YouTube, how often my review on Google Maps has been read or anything of the sort.
2. Messaging is the main source of notifications for me. Always mute groups in messaging apps. They tend to have a large volume of messages and will cause your phone to vibrate almost non-stop. Additionally messages in groups are rarely important or urgent. Luckily I’ve already been following this for many years.
3. In bed I typically put my phone in “Do not disturb” as this silences notifications.
4. My phone also strictly doesn’t have anything work related.

I’ve also been considering if I want my phone permanently in “do not disturb” mode, with a few exceptions carved for messages from important people (mostly family). I’d then have to actively unlock my phone to be able to check if I have any new messages. This may however cause the opposite effect, where I start checking my phone more often because I want to know if there are new messages. So I need to think about the most appropriate way to do this. Maybe I should just try it out.

Reducing triggers

All non-notification-based triggers I think are harder to fix. They require some amount of self-control and they have slowly become a habit for you. There are however a few places where I think I can easily reduce it. I’ve started not bringing my phone to the bathroom and instead just leave it at my desk. For situations where I’m waiting for anything I try to exercise a bit of self-control. I think everything in life is a skill, and self-control is definitely one I want to be very good at.

Unrelated note

I wrote this post in my balcony this morning. I’m glad I managed to write it in less than 45 minutes (partially I think this is because I’ve been spending most of my personal project time on QuartoVerde, so I knew I had to write more focused to save time). I’m also glad I’m enjoying this balcony to the fullest. It’s a bit chilly this morning (17 degrees), so I got a blanket to cover my legs and a comfortable jacket. It’s also the first time I worked on a personal project before going to work. Maybe I should do this more often.